All gold..

 As part of my job, I get to embrace a lot of gold chains/bracelets/rings /earrings, and being a woman, the temptations are real, to wear and own it. These desires grew stronger day by day, which landed me in a spot through the receptionist, where there is no camera coverage and with a deal that I have to allow her to wear it for a selfie. Well, one is taken care of, the wanting to possess at least a few did not allow me to sleep. I could not afford to buy any one of them because our peanut salary gets invisible into the endless loan, education fees, and all the bills. I did not want to become a gold thief, hence for now decided to sleep over the thought.  Days flew fast as the gossip on my Instagram jewel post. Few thought I won the lottery and interestingly, few assumed that my husband is getting black money in his IT job. Whatever the gossips where, but it made me feel like a celebrity in my neighborhood.  All the unknown faces become known. I got to choose the vegetable first in the vegetable cart. I was asked opinion in all which does not matter to me, but my opinion mattered.  Everyone wanted to talk about the jewel more, and I started building stories for such a question. “Fake it till you make it” as I read and kept it as my status. But all these changed when one such a Sunday, while I was picking the dried clothes. My beloved neighbor, Shanthi joined me on the terrace asked whether she could rent the necklace for a function to make her relatives a little jealous. I got nervous and dropped the entire clothes which I was holding in my hand. I asked, “what?” as though I did not hear her correctly.  The “kerala style arumbu gold necklace” with green saree,  on Instagram, looked stunning with saree. “Oh! Yes, the aurmbu necklace..”. I mumbled.  “can you give me for one day?”  she requested. I could not say no, because it will disturb my status in the neighborhood. “I said, oh ! sure.. I will give you, then I asked with a trembling voice, when is the function?” She said coming Wednesday. “Okay.. sure. I have to go down. Your anna will ask for coffee”, I made a false excuse and rushed to my downstairs. My brain becomes suddenly blank and realized I lost my thinking ability. “How I would get the Aurmbu necklace? Can I buy it in a week? Oh shit!! What a mess!”.

Well, wait! I think you got my profession wrong. I am not a saleswoman in some jewelry shop. Then, who are you is the question, right? I am a loan officer in Muthu finance, the organization which lends money for the gold value with the condition. Today, I am excited and nervous as I reach the interview venue which is few minutes far away and my mind does not stop echoing the lines which I do not want to tell in front of the camera.

I enjoy my work truly because it involves listening to people and make them do as I wish.  I feel it is one of the smartest jobs comparing to my husband’s IT job where he sits in front of a laptop all the while and just stares at it. Whereas I influence people to buy few more products along with loans by listening to them because most of the customers while sharing their personal stories they will leave a hint about them. Thatswhy my name is there in the dashboard as the best performer for 3 months continuously. 

“Cut, cut, madam, it is an interview. Keep your answers short and neat. Where is your introduction? Please speak what is given to you.. “ the director says. “okay, sir!, I say.

Take, camera roll…

“Hello, everyone! I am Umadevi, everyone calls me Uma. The director again said,  “cut, cut.!! Does it really important to mention the nick or calling name?” he asks. I apologize again.

“Take, action and camera roll,” says the director. 

“I am Umadevi. Age 39. I stay in electronic city, Bangalore. My house is on the 2nd floor. I stay in a rented house.” 

“Cut, cut. Madam, you forget to mention the cross number and street name and how many steps you need to climb to reach the house? He shouts “pack-up”! Shoot will be tomorrow,  I do not know what you to do but make her ready “, he shouts at his assistant and leaves. 

I was about to cry but could not. I did not know what to do. The assistant pulled the chair with a creech sound and sat next to me. “Not a problem, Madam. No tension. Just memorize and tell as written in the paper.. “ he requests. I say, “Umm…” and leave from there. I take a deep breath and walk toward the bus stand. My mind started echoing again. The truth.

As usual, on a Monday morning, I was preparing breakfast thinking about how to get the “Arumbu necklace”. My 14, year-old daughter, attending online school has not still woken up. My OCD husband kept the news on the 30 volume and sitting in the sound like a statue. Thinking of his OCD to listen to the news on this top volume and  I stop cutting vegetables and switch off the television. I told him, “Listen I want “Arumbu necklace” by tomorrow and I showed him my insta picture.” “Oh! this one, “will I able to sell my one kidney today? and move from here” with a sarcastic reply, he switched on the TV again with 32 volume. I just stood there and stared at him. My daughter woke up sensing the burning smell and asked “what is burning today? with her yawning. I rushed towards the kitchen and switched off the stove. I announced “No cooking today” and left to take bath. My daughter and husband look at each other and said, “I am going to buy idly from the corner shop. Do you want something?” That moment, I did not know whether to laugh or cry. Ignoring their question, I got ready and left to office. 

While walking on the streets, I told myself, buying was not an option. I need to do find another way. 

When I  reached the office, I saw only Nalini, immensely over the phone. I assumed she was chatting with her fiancé.  I forced a  smile at her and sat back at my desk. “Accha, Nalini, listen, “when is the audit for last week jewels?”.  “hey, it is moved to next month as the auditor got corona. I think soon there will be lockdown and our office will be shut”. I was surprised and happy, “Oh that’s bad!!”, I said and started thinking about my plan. Until audit, the jewel will not move to the main office. The jewel was in my office’s lock room and  I had the keys. Internally I thanked corona for the moment and I decided to take the jewel for three days and return back. 

I switch on my system and was playing with mobile for a while as there no customer to attend. It was around 12 PM. Nalini and others left for lunch and  I was alone in the office. I carefully removed the jewel from the locker and kept it safely in my handbag. 

I still remember the customer whom I approved a loan on this jewel for her medical expenses. She was keen to tell me that, this is a very special jewel, Madam.  My late grandma gave me this necklace for my marriage and asked me to keep it safe and not to wear it as it might break. Now, the situation is very bad at home. I need to keep this for a loan. Once I clear it, I will keep it back in safe locked. She sighs! That time, I took them on a lighter note as I was happy that she took health insurance along with a loan.  The jewel looked stunning, I could not stop myself for a selfie. 

I stole it, no, no. Just take it for 3 days like renting! After reaching home, I had enough time with the ornament. So I could not resist again. I wanted to show it to my OCD husband and daughter. They got excited but had a lot of questions to ask me. I stopped them for a moment and  I told them, I will explain a little later and first let me have some water. l slipped off as my OCD husband and daughter filled the kitchen floor with water in the process of cleaning utensils and the worst thing that happened is that the jewel broke into two pieces. From the broken necklace, one ring came out. I could not understand why a ring there inside the chain and the chain is broken. In that anguish, I forget to yell at my husband and daughter for the kitchen mess. I gathered the broken pieces and the ring and quickly ran to the bedroom. My daughter came behind me. Watching all these, my husband increased the television volume to 36. I tried to fix the broken jewel and prayed to all god to fix it but it was not happening. Without my knowledge, my daughter took the ring and she tried it.  

Excited girl, wanted to show her papa the new ring but he was inside the news To get his attention, she touched him. Suddenly he turns to a gold statue. My daughter started screaming. I rushed and saw, my husband, a golden statue. We both were stuck. My daughter tried to hold me as she was not able to stand and I slowly turned to a gold statue and my husband got normal. My daughter was scared furthermore threw the ring outside and it landed on our tulsi plant. I got normal and the tulsi leaves were shining in golden.  We were scared to touch it. Shanthi, who witnessed the tulsi plant and tried to pluck a leaf. She could not pluck it . We could not stop the neighborhood gathering at my house. The tulsi plant was in everyone's status and stories. Everyone filled their questions with us.  All I could answer was, “I am also in the same state as they are” and kept quiet.  Police sirens and few government employees came and asked about the details. I said, “we do not have any idea about it”. Please take it if needs to be the indifferent place. Government officials took the tulsi plant. All this while, we did not have water. After a long exhausting day, when I entered the bedroom, I found the necklace was perfectly fine and quickly put it back in the handbag and decided to keep it back in the office. I will manage Shanthi with one more story.

On the bus, the song “Nettru polu indru illai… “  makes to smile as though someone understands my condition and playing the lines for me.  The lines are “Not every day is the same day!!”

Saritha Subramanian